What if she gives birth!

Four of us are getting together at a Ceris' house in Leicestershire next weekend. Naomi is pregnant and is coming up from Kent. When I say pregnant, let me clarify that she is infact 2 weeks off being due.

So the emails started this week about what time to get there, what to bring, etc. The email conversation goes a little something like this below. Now I should say before reading it that Naomi is clearly getting very fed up with the snow, her largeness and life in general so please excuse the mild swearing. Also bear in mind that when she had Oscar around 5 years ago she nearly died in childbirth, found she had a rare blood disease and had to have her gall bladder removed at the same time:

Lisa: Yippee - can't wait!! Do you have hot water and soap just in case we're called upon to deliver a baby - god help you Naomi!

Naomi: The effin snow has set me back SO much, what with kids off school, not being able to get out and buy christmas presents, and a blinking LARGE baby in my belly - it's all so much hard work!!! So yes, I plan to be there by 6pm on Saturday, with my bottle of non alcoholic beer.....

Ceris: Hoorah, I'll see you all Saturday then. Towels, hot water and soap on standby...

Naomi: Are you CRAZY??? I'll need a whole lot more than towels and hot water if the baby comes when I'm up there!!! Some gear, for example would be good........!

Me: Would that be running gear - so you can run to the hospital perhaps? ;-) Or the latest fashion gear so you can look your best while giving birth. Or perhaps the latest shaving gear - also so you can look your best while giving birth!

Naomi: Ha Ha! Maybe you could shave my legs for me - I can't even wipe my own @rse, let alone reach down to shave my legs...... mind you, the long hairs have helped keep me warm in this weather!

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Ah the joys of motherhood. So much to look forward to!